A Reminder

The artist thought he heard a murder taking place
Over and down through the smoke and in the mirrors
The paint was too smudged and a brush was on the floor
The light wasn't allowing him to see the difference
The river had a town on it's side with a handful of lovers
Nobody dreaded the lovers and the lovers dreaded nobody
The reflection in the water made everything look resigned
The sign over the bridge was stolen at least once a year
Breakfast in the hotel was a celibate affair
Outside the weather was holding us hostage at sub zero
The hexagons on the wallpaper made our eyes hurt
And then the clouds broke against the window
I don't remember much, there was litter on the floor
There was a fool who drove past with no lights on
A bird shocked the chef as it hit the window's reflection
And a new Jesus was born into the suburbs
He reminded me that I must:

Find the large man with bent nose and kiss him upon his clean shaven cheek
Drink champagne on the roof of a house in London and watch the sun rise
Write letters to my friends and tell them that they are my favourite songs that I sing
Own things of no value to anyone but me until the day I die
Visit the white isle and run my fingers along the lines between the rocks that make the wall
Seek out the grave of the photographer and lay a prayer for her
(She would like this)
Buy the art that was left on the walls in a house in which people have forgotten to look
Live in New York and write odes to the stupid men who I love
Find a star and claim it as mine and do the same thing over and over
Become addicted to stupidity and give up on doubt
Catch a train from a friend numb with loss to a friend who will warm with comfort
Pick fruit from the branch and throw it at a stranger
Make love to a man who knows too much, who is dangerous, and doesn't speak the language

I told this Jesus that I do not need reminding
That I am sick with knowing all these things everyday
They are a constant, like a harmony that I can not get out from my mind
He said 'Well all will be fine, just don't become what you see on the train'
And so with my feet on the seats I have to write letters
Letters of wonder and letters of enquiry
When all I really want to do is throw fruit at strangers

At some stage I know that I will land on a beach and look across to the headland
A memory will rise from my spine and crash against my whole head
Caused, perhaps, just by a minor scent or a noise and then setting off avalanches inside me
I will be standing on this beach hearing the gulls and seeing the elderly walk their dogs
And I will be thinking about the distance of the past, the stupidity of surrendering friendships
The invisible line between whispering a song and singing a lullaby
The invisible line between being a lover and being a friend who knows everything
At some stage I know I will walk along with damp shoes and sand in my hand
A whole different other ocean in my mind, one crashing against my being
With thoughts of too many days and words and poems and lives so beautiful
And I will feel the world fall apart beneath my legs and I will fall onto the sand
Gripping and grabbing at the sand, those calm and peaceful grains
As I feel the world give way and when I awaken I know there will be nothing left
But myself and a whispering figure who has no choice but to ask me why I live with an ocean inside
I will have no choice but to tell him what I know through falling beneath too many avalanches

The cornflowers still grow in the garden
The train tracks are rusted and no longer in use
I have dreamt that I have found gold within aeroplane wreckages
Twice now
I dare not ask the Turkish nation what this means
There are thistles growing throughout this rain soaked summer
Grass is everywhere and horses sleep at night with mice running around their legs
Like men around giant pillars or trees
As blue sky shows I notice the figs are ripening
Ready to be given away
And the Blackberries are ready to be burnt
In my heart love is a question mark
In my mind sex is merely tiresome
The song my body sings is surely at its chorus
But nobody seems to know the words
I am that one fruit tree in the heart of the jungle
The tree that will keep everyone alive if they look hard enough
If they are looking for an apple tree in the tropics
We follow the line of electricity
And I can taste my medication curdling my breath
I can hear a buzzing with a rhythmic energy
Like a bee flying along with a cantering horse
The fences are exhausting me
But what does the forest care
The trees keep growing and the grass keeps seeding